Fly away, little pretty bird

Meet my Judy Branch Family - Bill & Billy Jo Caudill

In a few hours my adventure begins. My bag is packed and waiting by my bedside. I'm all ready to go. But my heart, just for now, is on Judy Branch.

I am no stranger to grief. Those of you who know me well know that I have experienced quite an extraordinary share of loss in my short life. While death of loved ones is something quite familiar and frequent for me, it never does get easier.

People talk about how their hearts get broken. I've often found myself thinking that my heart just can't break any more than it already has... But the thing is about hearts is that they are muscle. You can strain them, you can sprain them, you can tear them. Hearts can ache, they can get out of rhythm and they can become diseased. But they don't break. Somehow, until you die, they just keep on beating.

I have always been attracted to Buddhist teachings, and in many ways I try to live my life along those lines. The hardest part for me has always been attachment, though. I get attached to the people in my life. I love them dearly.

I'm sure that part of my path to healing will be to bring up all the ghosts of my life and deal with my attachments to people who have left this world. But for this moment, I just want to honor a very special person who passed away today.

If you read my Judy Branch blog, you'll be reading about a life made possible because two very special people basically adopted me into their family and invited me to live out on their land.


Not only did I enjoy old time music and square dancing with Bill & Billy Jo Caudill, I learned how to work the land and how to honor it at the same time. We talked about how to keep deer and raccoons out of the gardens and discussed Wendell Berry's writings. And when I had a crisis with a hornet's nest or a rogue pressure cooker, they were always there to help in a heartbeat.


They invited me to join them for family gatherings and opened up their place and their kitchen to host visiting musicians I brought out to the hollow.

I feel honored that Bill & Billy Jo Caudill adopted me into their family and welcomed to live on Judy Branch. My heart is strained right now at the news that Bill passed away today. But I know that he would have been so supportive and interested in my adventure, which begins in just a few short hours. So even though my heart is aching right now, I am going to fly away with joy as well as grief in my heart.


This is the song in my heart right now.